Day 3, date night.

So…it’s day 7 of #30positive days. You remember the challenge Nan and I gave you, right?

I sure do.  Whoa. Do I ever.  What a week it has been.  In fact, this is better than our first challenge was:  30 days of intimacy.  Saying nice things about each other creates the kind of wonderful feelings that lead to, well, INTIMACY, physical and emotional intimacy.  The “run for the drugstore and buy some Azo” kind of intimacy.   It’s like a combination of challenge 1 and challenge 2, except that it’s not challenging at all.  Oh, and it’s not just me who thinks it’s going well:  on Day 3, we went to the theater, and a complete stranger asked if we were newlyweds.

Here’s the play by play:

As I typed this blog on Wednesday, I noticed Eric post all 6 days to FB.

Day 1:

He said: Pamela has been wonderful, caring and loving to my parents.

She said: Eric brings out the best in others, to encourage them, to give them opportunity; he is a wonderful and selfless person.

Day 2:

He said:  Pamela is wonderfully relentless on goals. I respect her determination and courage. Great example for her kids.

She said:  Eric gets better looking every year but is without vanity.

Day 3:

He said: Pamela has an incredible presence, she takes over a room. She has a combination of beauty, intelligence, & careful listening.

She said: Eric has a creative problem-solving mind. We met at work. I thought he was brilliant then, & I still do.

Day 4:.

He said:  You can count on her. If she says she will do something, she will.  If she says she loves you, she does

She said:  Eric is of Hungarian/gypsy descent: gorgeous dark skin, individualistic, impulsive, good-proud, intense dark eyes.

Day 5:

He said:  Pamela has an incredibly beautiful singing voice. It does not come out often, but you can tell when she is feeling good!

She said:  Eric is fiercely loyal. Never has anyone taken my side, had my back, & protected me like Eric. I am safe.

Day 6:

He said:  She consistently cares about and is good to my kids, even when they are not in return to her.

She said:  Eric has a really cute butt!

Day 7:

He said:  ??? Dunno yet!

She is saying: (for the first time here) Eric is an amazingly caring father who invests his time and emotional energy into the development, security, and well-being of his kids, in the face of a LOT of adversity, and whether or not they appreciate him and show love and caring back to him.

Me, cooping my husband. We had just returned from 2 hrs of ballroom dance lessons and needed to get on the bikes for a few minutes to live up to our ongoing 30 days of biking challenge. That challenge is fun, too, just not AS much fun.

Honestly, how could you not be madly in love with each other after a week of that kind of sharing?  It rocks.  We’ve done our “bigging each other up” on Twitter, Facebook, and of course face to face and on this blog.  {You don’t have to go that public — we’re role modeling the challenge for its participants and to attract others to it.}  Our kids think we’re dorks and roll their eyes.  But they smile.

Here are the other brave souls joining us in the challenge, daring to buck the popular trend of husband/wife/partner/kid-bashing:

My Inner Chick

Julie C. Gardner

Two Normal Moms

Wild Child Mama

Eric Hutchins: my husband, occasionally blogs here under pressure from me :)

A Stone’s Throw From Insanity

Little Bitty Things

Little Black Dress Diaries

Our Side of Paradise

Blue Cotton Memory

Momma’s Soapbox

Savor the Ride

LLM Calling

Myra CG Mibus — Idyllwild

There are other participants who wish to remain anonymous, as well as people I suspect are participating but afraid to say so.  Bwack bwack bwack…that’s my chicken noise for ya.

Wanna play? If so, I’ll add your link to the list.   Here are the rules for the sandbox:

Say something nice to and about your partner every day for 30 days. Praise her, encourage him, spotlight her best traits, tell us your favorite things about him.  In order for your participation to count, you need to

a) Make your proclamation 100% positive, no BUTS, HOWEVERS, or ON THE OTHER HANDS

b) You can’t ask for anything in return

c) You must make him or her aware of it each day

d) You also have to make sure you make at least one additional person aware of it each day

e) You need to either link to Nan’s or my blog, or send us an email, or comment to us on Twitter (#30positivedays), Facebook, or one of our blogs, so that we know you are participating and we in turn can send positive thoughts your way (the more of that coming at you, the better, I always say)

You may tell them why you are doing it, if they ask.  You may do it for more than one person, if you’d like (but Lordy I hope you don’t have more than one partner, or that may defeat the idea of intimacy we are trying to achieve here!!).  If you don’t have a partner, per se, you can select someone else important in your life for the challenge, too.

Ciao for now,

A glowing Pamelot 🙂

p.s. Speaking of positive, go check out Heidi Milton’s List of 1,000 Gifts for Lent by Easter post series, which starts with a wonderful post about finding the strength for the positive in the midst of the tragic suicidal death of a teenager.

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27 Responses to If you don’t have something nice to say, then you’re probably not talking about my husband.

  1. Ally says:

    I smell intimacy and challenge success just oozing all around here! 😉
    Ally recently posted..Dirty Words

  2. Sandy says:

    Since I am partnerless (is that even a word?) I am choosing to say something nice about my treadmill every day. Now that is a challenge as our relationship hasn’t been that great the last few years….LOL!!
    Sandy recently posted..Sad News

  3. LBDDiaries says:

    Awwwww – love is in the air! And on your faces! And in your bedroom! And on the dance floor! And on the bikes! And… and… and…! Isn’t this challenge amazing? I was also surprised it created the same intimacy as the Intimacy Challenge did – wow. Alpha Hubby is totally “OK, what did you say today?” or “Did you forget me?” when I didn’t say it until late evening yesterday. I love this!
    LBDDiaries recently posted..30 Positive Days 2-4 Romantic Faithful Non-Couch Potato

  4. Awwwww I’m so proud of all your lovers out there. Romance is just the best thing ever!

  5. Ooooops that was supposed to read “you lovers” not your lovers. The latter could open up worm cans all over. Don’t want that. LOL

  6. Eric Hutchins says:

    ALLLLLL YOUR LOVERS, PAMELA, when were you going to tell me that?????

  7. Oh what a cool challenge. You guys are very cute. In the preschools where I work I do challenges similar to this, only with 4 and 5 year olds who have gotten in the habit of not being very nice to each. It is remarkable to see the power of a sincere compliment.

    • Pamela says:

      Simple yet powerful. And shocking how resistant many people are to ot. I lose followers every tome I go on a positive streak. Won’t stop me, tho 🙂

  8. Irene says:

    You two must in the most fantastic shape! Between running, biking and the ballroom dancing…
    Irene recently posted..Tangled Webs-Living the High Life

  9. Heidi M says:

    Add great supporter and cheerleader to your list of postitives, my friend. 🙂 Many thanks for the mention. Amazing how contagious it is to say nice things to one another…even in the midst of blended family/life nitty gritty. Love reading them… I’ll see if I can get El Presidente on board. 🙂
    Heidi M recently posted..Going Lower

  10. ~~Pamela,
    You both R beautiful!!!! 🙂

  11. JennyBean says:

    Gah! Feeling nauseated.

    🙂

  12. Loved this story too Pamela! We just returned home from a getaway for our 26th anniversary and its funny when you getaway together how easy it is to be nice and loving, lol! So I told him that I wanted us to say something nice to each other every morning…You just motivated me to act on that thought! Thanks;)

    • Pamela says:

      Can you believe it’s been 26 years for you guys? Good for you guys! You have always been such a great couple and example to others. Great to hear you are acting on intentions. WAY too few people do.

  13. […] Date night is a revered tradition at our house. No ruts for us — we’re always looking for a new activity. One month, Eric planned a surprise for me. When I got to the car, he handed me a package. Not a gift-wrapped package, mind you, because he’s still a guy, but a bag of “stuff.” […]

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