Picture yourself retreating, here.

While you’re reading SHOCK JOCK and writing your limericks to enter my free-to-winners Reader Appreciation Retreat Contest, I am outlining the Laura novels (oh em gee, is it already nearly time for me to start writing them???).
Meanwhile, I thought I’d share some of the best of my limericks, poetry, and lyrics, to inspire (or horrify?) you over the next 2 months while you prepare your entry! While these suck, they are all copyrighted to me.

  1. Limericks from many years ago 😉

(And this is why I write prose rather than poetry: Odes to my family, in limerick style.  I framed these for them one Christmas.  They were not impressed.)

Liz “Bean”: High school swimming teenager with more clothes, shoes, makeup and hair straighteners than the rest of us put together.

There once was a girl from Bellaire

Who daily did straighten her hair

A fast swimming teen

A Facebooking Bean

She can never decide what to wear

Clark: High school debate & robotics, Dallas Cowboys biggest fan, you know him from the ADHD-world in the Clark Kent Chronicles.  I wrote such amazing limericks on Clark, I couldn’t limit this post to just one.
Number One:

There lives here a boy named Clark

He treats school much like a lark

If he ever gets through

What he’s started to do

We are sure he will leave quite a mark

Number Two:

A dramatic and unruffled soul

A haircut a lot like a bowl

Witten’s best fan

Homework not in his plan

To be a big dork is his goal


Are you ready for some Maggie in LIVE WIRE, SICK PUPPY, and DEAD PILE?

Maggie imbibes ~ Maggie radiates ~ Maggie transforms

Speaking of imbibing, we’ll be lifting a glass along with her in a giveaway of a big ole gift basket of Koltiska Distillery merchandise (liqueur-infused coffee, mugs, and more). The winning readers in my Reader Appreciation Retreat Contest will attend a Maggie Trilogy Celebration at Koltiska in Sheridan, Wyoming, as well!

a Rafflecopter giveaway


Suz: Middler schooler whose hygiene habits indicate she is not yet interested in boysLoves dogs, swimming, and disagreeing.

Amanda Susanne is her name

Contrariness is her main game

She’s strong and she’s tall

She likes dogs best of all

But her showering skills are quite lame

Eric:  My long-suffering island-boy-turned-Texas-redneck-wannabe triathlete husband.

There once was a man from St. Croix

With a fanny as fine as a boy’s

I may give him heck

But I love his red neck

He inspires the name Road to Joy**

(**Road to Joy was the original name of this blog, back when I wrote nothing but family drivel instead of novels…wait…is this the same thing??)

2. Love rhymes (and not rhymes): coming soon

3. Original lyrics from my books: coming soon

4. Poetry published only on the blog: coming soon

Get to writing those limericks. I can’t wait to see your contest entries <3

p.s. It’s my birthday…I’m 27 again! We’re celebrating with what is sure to be a diet-blowing dinner, a stay at a small town Texas B&B, and the Old Coupland Dancehall to see Tanya Tucker. <3

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